Sunday, November 14, 2010

God What are You Teaching Me? A Life Interrupted!

Have you ever been in a moment, when you were able to look back and see the tapestry of your life?   A tapestry not completed by any means, but at a point that you see  the beauty of the creation, and not so much the snags and knots that seemed impossible at the time. Each beautiful thread touched by God's own hands, woven into a magnificent story. A story that at that very moment has a clear purpose in your life.

 6 weeks ago, I started a Bible Study titled, Jonah: Navigating a Life Interrupted by Priscilla Shirer. For several weeks now, I have attended weekly, studied daily, and really enjoyed the discussion; but found myself thinking... How does this apply in my life?  The other girls in my group seemed to have been going through a season of "interruption" or just come out of one... Of course, God has "interrupted" my life before, but what was happening now? 

And then, His word spoke to me... I was looking back over the study, and this verse Hit me like a ton of bricks!

"Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life."  Psalms 139:23-24

I began to pray that prayer.... Which is so scary!!
What was God going to show me? Did I really want to own up to it? Was I ready to do this?

But I continued and day by day, God began to reveal to me that there was a huge part of my life I had not given to him. A part, that I didn't want to give up, I didn't want to let go... it was much to precious and I wanted to keep it for myself, and make sure nothing ever happened to it!

Can I just tell you what a hard time I was having! I am talking major inner struggle, a big knot in my tapestry!!  I want my children to love God! I want them to grow to be warriors for Christ. I want them to have a relationship with God and to know the unconditional love and grace, that covers them daily.
I also know good and well, that  I can't do all that by myself...

But, if I let go, what if something happened to my boys? What if God's plan was different than mine? Could I bear that.. what would I do? What if it wasn't all pretty and sweet as I have planned it in my mind?

As I sat one day thinking about all of this, contemplating God's work in my own tapestry, I knew what God was asking me to do. I had to obey and willingly give God control to interrupt my sweet boys' lives. So I did,  I committed to fight the temptation to control. I made the choice to step back and give God the control!  No matter what God's plan is for our family, individually and together, I will trust in HIM! I will follow unconditionally! And can I just say, God never fails to amaze me! 

Almost everyday since, God has opened doors of discussion with the boys. Over the last week we have talked about Heaven, Death, Truth, Love for Others, things that we talked about before, some alot, but this time it was different. These discussions were on Gods time, and not mine.

Priscilla Shirer says, "When we come face to face with God and respond in obedience, we will see supernatural results."   and I expect nothing less! God will do great things, just look back at the tapestry He has woven in your life and each life around you. Even the lives that refuse to believe, are covered in God's amazing work. 

I am so thankful that I have a God, that never lets me down. Even when I'm not sure of His plan, and I can't see my way through the tangles and snags of my "interrupted" life, God never fails! And I know He will not fail my children either. They must face there own "interruptions"... and I will watch from the bleechers cheering encouragement and guidance as God, the faithful, unwavering, loving, God;coaches them through life.   

1 comment:

  1. what an important lesson. that is something that i struggle w/ as well. thanks for sharing God's faithfulness. it's always there...we just sometimes forget to look for it.