Recently I found myself watching a late night talk show host interviewing a beautiful blonde, young, talented, actress. I listened as the host asked numerous questioned and also to her responses each filled with more self doubt than the next. Her low self esteem became so evident that the host even stopped her mid sentence to give her some "fatherly" advice and a little pep talk about self acceptance. I found myself feeling so sorry for her and yet relating with her so much. As a teenager, I always felt sub par. I remember thinking to myself if I could even be average that would be better than what I am now. Nothing I tried (and I tried alot) ever made me feel more popular, or special, or more accepted. I listen to women of all ages now and my heart aches for them as they begin comparing themselves, My hair is too straight, Mine is too Curly, I have freckles, I have brown hair and I want blonde, I weight too much, I weigh too little, I have so many wrinkles, I have gray hair, I look to old, I look to young... the list goes on and on.... I know I have been there!
Until just a few years ago, I still looked at myself in the mirror every day picking myself apart and telling myself I didn't deserve certain things because I was frankly not attractive enough. Then one day while doing a Bible Study it hit me like a brick! God made me this way! THIS WAY!! He made me to have curly hair, freckles, crooked eyes, and spaghetti arms, and all of a sudden I was able to look at myself through the eyes of my Heavenly Father. If you are a mother you know when you are holding your little one in your arms, you don't see their freckles as a disturbing sight, you love each sweet spot on their little face; that is just the way God sees us and I believe the way we should view ourselves.
I still struggle sometimes, especially when going into a new situation with new people... "Will these women accept me? Will they secretly think I'm dressed strangely? or that my hair cut is ugly?" But I have to just step back and remember that it doesn't matter what anyone thinks. I am here to serve my God, not to impress with the latest trends and beauty treatments. I have to remind myself that I should be much more concerned at the appearance of my heart. I try my hardest to beautify my heart through Christ alone and to remember, I am accepted through and through by my Father; as are you sister!
Thank you Lord for making us just the way you planned. Lord you have made our planet so beautiful, you have given us wondrous stars to peer at in the darkness, and you have made us in your image, the most beautiful of all. Please help us to see the beauty that you have instilled in all creation! Thank you for being such a wonderful example of beauty through your Love and your Son. I love you Lord. Amen.